Udon, anyone?

It is always hard to write about something you neither loathe nor love.  Kotohira Noodles is like that.  Their specialty is udon, and their noodles are homemade.  But what can I say about them?  Are they delicious?  Sure.  Very delicious?  Sorry, but no.  

The homemade udon noodles are indeed very good.  They are thick, firm and just a bit chewy.  I had their kake udon combination, which included a side plate of tempura.

Dinner was visually pleasing.  And if the noodles were lovely both in texture and flavor (an appropriate just-enough-wheatiness), then why the tepid review?  Well, in short, it was the broth.  A clear udon broth should be relatively light in flavor, but never bland, and this was a darnright bland broth.  It was uninteresting and did not offer any unexpected goodies from its brothy layers.  Really, the problem may have been that the broth didn't actually contain any notable layers, at least none that were discernable to the tastes of the modern Asian Couple.

The tempura though, was enjoyable and the restaurant's atmosphere was pleasant.  The service was excellent, but of course my primary concern is the delectable-ness of the nooodle soup.  And even though Kotohira is one of those awesome places where you can label your own sake bottle with a picture of your face, I can't say I'd be excited to go back.

Sapp Coffee Shop

Sapp Coffee Shop
5183 Hollywood Blvd.
Los Angeles, CA 90027
(323) 665-1035

For the Asian Couple, any visit to Los Angeles is ultimately an excuse to visit Thai Town. Such a visit poses a classic noodly dilemma: Sapp's or Ord? Separated by three blocks, these two nondescript spots are competing monuments to noodle perfection in my mental geography. They are the Temple Mount and the Dome of the Rock, the Empire State and the Chrysler Building, the Eiffel Tower and the Champ Elysees, T-Pain and The Dream. Whlie Ord excels at a wide variety of noodle soups, always teasing us with something new, torturing us with the unbearable anxiety of choice, Sapp is the undisputed thai boat noodle soup champ:

I've recently learned that the broth is a mixture of beef broth, pork blood, herbs and spices. Floating in that are bits of beef, fried pork rind, tendon, liver, chili, and one of my favorites, beef ball. The magic of the boat noodle bowl lies in the density of the thing. Taste the broth. We're talking sweet, salty, hot and sour, all balanced precariously against each other. The flavors are all there, but they take their time revealing themselves, letting one flavor take the spotlight, then the next. Then you get into the soup itself and its an index of texture: soft noodle, chewy tendon, rubbery beef ball, crunchy rind. Sapp's thai boat noodle is a catalogue of sensation, a census of noodle soup possibilities. If this noodle soup were an abstract expressionist,  it would be Jackson Pollock: messy, rural, startingly original, cerebral yet accessible, a paradoxical artist of brute means but refined effects. 

The second noodle at Sapp that is worthy of our accclaimation is the Jade Noodle, which is a refined, but contested entry into the NSP simply because it is served in two modes: dry and soupy. I got it dry:

This of course raises several issues. Chief among them the question of this thing's status as a noodle soup. However, since the jade noodles are completely delicious AND available as a noodle soup, I think it deserves to be here. What's in jade noodles? I confess I'm not entirely sure. I am almost certain that there were duck bits, crab bits and roast pork bits, along with cilantro and a green noodle that, upon further inspection, reveals itself to be leprauchan hair, which is delicious. The noodles arrive at the table dry and slightly warm, hiding underneath it a tasty sauce, crushed peanuts and green onions. The jade noodles, to my knowledge, are only to be found at Sapp's. It is a thing of restrained beauty -- elegant, deceptively simple, offering an unexpected combination of elements. It is Brice Marden to the boat noodle-as-Jackson-Pollock.

Ord of the Noodles

First stop on the delicious train?  

Ord Noodles

5401 Hollywood Blvd

Los Angeles, CA 90027

Ord is a small, no-frills Thai restaurant/noodle house in Hollywood.  Yes, it's worth the drive.  Yes, it's worth the risk of illegally parking in the adjacent strip mall/Ralph's/Shoe Pavilion parking lot.  And yes, you will only spend an average of $6.00 on an adequately sized bowl of noodles.

On our latest visit, I had their Yen Ta Fo.  Fish cake, fried tofu, various vegtables, and other tasty morsels swim in a bowl of arromatic bright pink broth.  The soup itself is sweet, salty and sour and arrives piping hot.  Ask for your dish "medium spicy" and it will come out "spicy".  Ask for your dish "spicy" and it will come out "Thai spicy", meaning that it will burn your mouth and ultimately, make you cry.  This place would rather not compromise it's integrity in order to appeal to the broader crowd of sensitive and squeamish eaters.   At least, that's the impression I get.  

Their noodles are never too soft or sticky and never too hard or crunchy.  I had the Yen Ta Fo with rice stick noodles.  Throughout the course of my meal, the white rice noodles would progressively soak up more and more of the incredibly savory bright pink broth.  This noodle soup is like many in its composition: multi-layered in its numerous ingredients, whimsical in the ways it chooses to reveal its many flavors and flavor combinations to you.  

The Yen Ta Fo at Ord is so far the best I've had.  It is never bland.  And it never overpowers the eater with only one flavor.  It makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside.  And if I get it really spicy, it also makes my head buzz a little.  

Also try the Pad Kee Mao.  Fresh ingredients, solid flavors, also a nice tasting experience, and better made than most Thai "fast noodle" joints.  

Editorial Addendum:

Ord is indeed amazing. I had Thai Sukiyaki, which had superior brothiness and a great array of consistently surprising tasty bits (squid legs! a mussel-in-hiding!). The soups at Ord also tend to come with a crunchy-chewy mystery bit. I think it's a kind of wood-fungus. Initially, she thought it was a sea dweller. Whatever it is, it serves to soak up broth, and offer a nice contrast to its other soupy denizens. 

I mean just look at this thing:

The Noodle Soup Project

In the following weeks and months (years?) we will be bringing you reports from the field on the best in Noodle Soups, an ongoing project here at Asian Couple Monthly titled simply, The Noodle Soup Project (NSP).  

The Basics  

Why Noodle Soups? 

First, because they are delicious. 

Second, because if there is any one thing that unites the many and diverse Asian peoples (and couples) it is our universal appreciation for different kinds of noodle soups. There is no better gauge of the size, diversity and vitality of an Asian neighborhood than the quality of the noodle soups found there. 

Third, because noodle soups are widely misunderstood by non-Asians as "just soup," and therefore at best, an auxillary dish to a proper meal, when in fact they are compact, satisfying and endlessly delicious meals in and of themselves. Noodle soups are a noble dish, and like tacos, curries, hoagies and empanadas, they are beloved by peasants and kings alike.  

Editor: And fourth, comfort. Hot steaming noodle soup (to an Asian couple, especially) = pure, uncomplicated comfort. What's better than sticking your face above a hot bowl of noodle soup and letting the steam waft up into your nostrils and fog up your eyeglasses? Next stop after satiating oneself on noodle soup?  

Bed.

What is a Noodle Soup?

Ramen. Pho. Boat noodles. Egg noodles. Spicy beef noodle. Duck noodles. Noodle soups are, at their most basic, comprised of noodle, broth and tasty bits. The noodle can be made of rice, egg, wheat, etc. They can be thin, wide, flat, tubular. Broth, on the other hand, is a little bit more complicated. It can be based on chicken, beef, pork or various seafoods. Tasty bits vary too. My favorite tasty bits are: fish balls, tendon, duck, shrimps, and cha-shu.

Editor: My favorites are: any type of seafood (imitation and otherwise), dried garlic, and of course, the noodles. Always the noodles. What's really imortant to understand about noodle soup is the Layers. Noodle soups are intricately and elegantly layered by their creators, much to the fortune (and appreciation) of our tastebuds.

The Layers, as my comrade has mentioned, are made of various tasty bits saturated in sometimes simple, but most usually complex broths which themselves are layered in constitution. These layers reveal themselves slowly and in stages to the eye, the nose, and the tongue. They are to be meticulously explored and leisurely savored.

Where Noodle Soups?

ACM is based in the larger LA metropolitan area and with some noted exceptions, will focus our reporting around the noodle soup establishments in that area.

How Noodle Soup?

Who can say for sure? A great noodle soup is magic. Like a great novel, or painting, an incredible noodle soup is a strange and inexplicable brew of tasty ingredients, authenticity, savory depth, grandmotherly knowhow, and chewy, toothsome noodle. It seems to, like the best of Russian literature, pull all of life, all sensations, all flavors into its delicious essence. It is an entire culture inside a spoon, a history lesson inside a single slurp.

Editor: I agree with the "magic" part above. Russian literature? Not so much. I would like to think that there exists a much better, more cheerful metaphor for the complexity and loveliness of noodle soups. Mmmm..let's say, bubble baths.

Welcome!

We know. Being an Asian couple is hard.

The modern Asian couple deals daily with the twin pressures of familial expectations and mainstream social stereotypes. We are #1 Asian sons and daughters, heirs to the family legacy, future professionals and entrepreneurs; we are also sexually fetishized/emasculated bodies, straight A graphic calculator programmers, button-down, play-by-the-rules employees, above-average candidates for unfulfilled middle management careers. In other words, we are, from both of our sides of our fractured identities, the product of other people’s fantasies — fantasies of the mitigated American dream: not fame, but stability; not fortune, but the comforting normality of the middle class.

That’s why we’ve put together Asian Couple Monthly, an essential guide to the best in asian-coupling, brought to you by the quintessential Asian couple. Please enjoy responsibly.